(image © 2012 Victor Varela)

On this cold and rainy, Saturday afternoon, our family laid to rest my Uncle Frank.
I would like share the eulogy I made during today’s funeral service.

I Talk to the Moon.
Eulogy for my Uncle, Francisco Arreguin.

“I talk to the moon, but it don’t listen to me.” How I remember when my uncle Frank would sing this to us when we were children. With his mild accent, he would sing the words and dance a few steps, as he would go into the chorus of this song. Sometimes we would sing along with him and howl, as if there was a full moon. At the time, I had no idea where he got these words from or the name of the song, I just remember him singing this to us.

As the years went by, he sang this song less frequently. But every now and then, something would trigger the memory of him singing this song and I would often wonder… what song was this verse from? For several years and up until recently, I looked everywhere online to find this song. It bothered me that after searching, I could not find the song that brought these wonderful memories of my uncle when I was a boy.

As he lay there before us on that Friday evening, slipping away into the welcoming arms of our lord and savior, we stood around his bedside and shared our memories of him. Within one of these recollections, I expressed my fondness for the song my uncle would sing to us. My cousin Manuel then stated that the song was from one of his favorite movies, “Paint Your Wagon.” At first I looked at him with disbelief. Then, using my phone, I quickly came across the soundtrack and lyrics. There, in the list of songs was the title,”I Talk to The Trees”. Could it be that after all this time, I couldn’t find this song because he had changed the words? I quickly realized that this was indeed the song I had been looking for all this time. Minutes later, Manuel found a video clip from this movie, being sung by none other than Clint Eastwood. I got goose bumps as we stood there listening to this song.

Before the song ended, I asked Manuel to place his cell phone next to my uncle’s ear, so that he could hear this song. Sadly, this was quite possibly, the last song he heard, as my uncle passed away, shortly there after.

Losing my uncle is one of the most difficult things I have gone through up until now. As I stand up here today, I would like to express how fortunate I am for having him as my uncle. It is difficult to put into words, his influence in my life and how that has become a part of who I am today.

My Uncle Frank was the beloved son of Manuel and Maxima Arreguin, brother to Celia, Lucha, Guadalupe and Maria. As a young boy growing up in Mexico, he wanted to be like his father; a train engineer. But fate had other plans for him, for as a boy, he took on the responsibility of being the man of the house when his father passed away. His devotion to his mother and the well being of his sisters from then on, became his focus. That devotion remained unwavering even when he immigrated to this country, married and started his own family.

Growing up in Boyle Heights, I remember how tight knit our small family was. We were what I call “The Original 10”, which included my Father Saul, my Mother and his sister, Guadalupe, my brother Martin, my sister Dolores; My Uncle Frank, my Tia Ana and my cousins – Manuel, Rosanna and Mireya. Since all of our relatives lived in Mexico; all we had was each other growing up on St. Louis Street.

I have so many wonderful memories of my Uncle Frank and all the things he did with us when we were children. Those memories continued as we grew older and we would always get together for birthdays, holidays, special events and backyard barbeques. Family unity was the legacy he wanted for his wife, children, their spouses, his grand-children and my family. He loved his family and was deeply devoted to them.

What most of us remember is that he was hardworking, strong, loving, and gentle. He was known for his infinite patience and his willingness to help in any way he could. He was never one to be idle and was always doing something to help his family and others. If he wasn’t helping a neighbor, he was picking up his Grand-kids from school. When he wasn’t devoting countless hours to his parish, St. Mary’s, he was helping those who were less fortunate then him. When he wasn’t welding and putting up a gate, he would call my mother, just to say hello and to check on how she was doing. When he wasn’t baking bread, he was working on countless projects around his house – much to the dismay of my aunt. I could go on with these examples, but as most of you know, my Uncle loved to give of his time and he did not believe in wasting it. The wealth he was rewarded with for his time and generosity is clearly evident as I look upon all of you who are here today.

(image © 2012 Victor Varela)

My uncle’s passing was quick but not unexpected. He had cancer and it was very aggressive and unforgiving. At the hospital he asked to go home, once it was determined nothing more could be done for him. He wanted to spend the last moments of his life at home surrounded by his family. He showed strength and love right up until his last days. He ended his physical journey there with us and transcended into his spiritual being, to join his lord, Jesus Christ.

He is in heaven now and as we are here to honor and remember him, let us all think back and remember how he touched our lives. He would not have wanted us to mourn him, but to celebrate his life and all the wonderful times we had with him.

Uncle Frank, I have so many wonderful memories to hang on to. You were an outstanding man and human being as well as a role model and a friend. Your guidance and love will carry me through to the end of my days.

I love you, Uncle Frank, and I will miss you very much.

(image © 2012 Victor Varela)

In Memory of Francisco Arreguin

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